Arguing and Fighting How to Overcome? Part 2
Don't Listen to the Voice of the Accuser
In part one of “Arguing and Fighting” the Bible teaches us that arguing our case means defending the enemy. Our arguments and fights are rooted in the satisfaction of our flesh - the desire to be right, accepted, known, - the desire to become someone when others think we're not, to maintain the identity we have of ourselves and not let the other rob who we think we are. Our flesh wants to be in control and fight for a violation of its privacy. The flesh demands its own expectations and standard to be met or kept. When someone disrrupts the 'standard' our flesh wants to maintain, the flesh attacks the violator/accuser. Arguments and fights can come out of jealousy and are rooted in 'lack'. Meaning they are rooted in something YOU are NOT, CANNOT or DON'T HAVE. Someone or your mind is focused on negative:
"I'm not this....."
"I haven't done that.............
"I should have done this.............
"I don't have...........
"I can't do ..................
"I'm missing and lacking .......
"I'm weak and failing..............
I struggle with sin........
My life is a mess..........
Arguments and fightings are rooted in condemnation we have receive.
Our flesh reacts and we argue because we received an accusation against us and our flesh was offended. This is when we react by removing our love (rejecting, avoiding, accusing back, hurting back, seeking revenge, ignoring -betrayal and maybe even hatred - murder).
Arguments are rooted in a heart that is hungry for love and acceptance, being right and justified. A heart that needs to eat the fruits of the Lord in the Garden. The more we eat the fruits of His love we will be able to bear love. The more we eat the fruits of His gentleness and kindness, we will not be shaken when someone is harsh with us.
Bearing good fruits begins with first EATING them. Allowing the Lord and asking Him to feed you with who He is for you. wants more than.. It is a place of void and high expectations to satisfy our void in a certain way. We look for others to answer our needs and desires. When they don't give us what we need, we fight and argue with them.
What happens when your flesh doesn't get what it wants, and it's not its way?
What happens when your flesh doesn't get what IT thinks it deserves?
When the food we need to receive from the Lord (of any of His good fruits) is not there and we remain hungry, we try to receive the need from people around us. But they are only human beings; they cannot be there for us 24/7 and are limited in how much they can give us. This is when the Accuser comes to feed our mind with his poisoneous junk food - with all kinds of negative thoughts. The Accuser speaks to us in first-person "I" or "me".
"How much that person is not there for me",
"how no one understands me",
"I am not respected"
"I'm ignored"
"No one loves me or cares for me"
"I'm alone"
"I'm quitting",
"can't they see I need help?"
"can't they see I'm right?"
This is when the condemnation grows like yeast in us and one little attitude, or negativity ......... and our flesh explodes. I
n an attempt to protect and shield ourselves we attack. Either attack to prevent ANY accusation from coming at us, or attack to stop accusations. The fighting begins and the division had already ben built up in our heart by the Accuser. The arguments are only the result; the outcome; of what's been growing in our mind.
Remember, the Accuser will always point to YOU - your identity, and your works.
He will point to who you are, or who you're not.
And your performance - how much you have failed to do this and that.
B. Arguing was dealt with by the Lord who explained the reason for it. He exposed the spiritual condition of the heart.
Yeshua showed us in Mark 8:17-17 why we argue. He said it is because…
1. We don’t have... (and you haven't asked)
2. We do not know or understand.
3. Because of the 'lack' of love the heart of the religious guys could not receive His love - this was because of lack of understanding.
4. They were spiritually blind and deaf. The blindness come from the Law which veils the heart. They lived under the old covenant of the Law.
5. Their memory failed them - hey could not remember the good things the Lord has done. They were focused on the negative - what's missing and lacking in their lives.
What to do instead of arguing?
The question should be “Who do you become?” It’s about finding your identity in Christ. When you know who He has already made you in Him, you will become it. You are complete in Christ. So, what’s missing or lacking in you?
The more you know who He says you are, the more you become it. Finding your true identity in Him based on His finished works in you, will transform your life.
As you behold His glory (image) you will be transformed into the same image you see. See Him and you will find your new created identity in Him. That will transform your life.
2Co 3:18 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding (seeing) as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.
1. Humble yourself in times of arguments if you can knowing your flesh – old nature; old identity; is nothing, it’s corrupt and there is nothing good in it. It’s only Christ in you who is good. Speak it if you can.
The people of the tribe of Ephraim had an intense argument with Gideon who did not call them to fight the Midianites. Gideon's response was humbling himself before them, and their anger subsided.
Jdg 8:1-3 NLT Then the people of Ephraim asked Gideon, "Why have you treated us this way? Why didn't you send for us when you first went out to fight the Midianites?" And they argued heatedly with Gideon. (2) But Gideon replied, "What have I accomplished compared to you? Aren't even the leftover grapes of Ephraim's harvest better than the entire crop of my little clan of Abiezer? (3) God gave you victory over Oreb and Zeeb, the commanders of the Midianite army. What have I accomplished compared to that?" When the men of Ephraim heard Gideon's answer, their anger subsided.
2. Remain silent and remember it's no longer you who lives, but Christ who lives in you. You are dead it’s Jesus alive in you.
3. Face the Lord and give your back to the enemy (don’t give your back to people).
4. Start having a conversation with the Lord and respond to Him.
5. Ask the Lord to reveal His love and His truth to you and renew your mind - so you can focus on who He is to comfort and give you peace.
Job 13:19-21 NLT Who can argue with me over this? And if you prove me wrong, I will remain silent and die. (20) "O God, grant me these two things, and then I will be able to face You… 22-23 Now summon me, and I will answer! Or let me speak to You, and You reply.
6. Trust the Lord. Trust who He is, not who you're not. It is God who changes the heart of the people, not us.
2Ti 2:25 Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people's hearts, and they will learn the truth. 26 Then they will come to their senses and escape from the devil's trap. For they have been held captive by him to do whatever he wants.
7. Resist the devil when he floods your mind with his accusations against you - by declaring your righteousness in Christ Jesus. "I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus. I have been justified (made righteous) by faith apart from my work (performance). Rom 3:28
8. Draw near to God – start seeking the Lord and learn to respond to His voice and avoid any voice of accusation which points to your identity or your performance (you are XXXXX, you didn’t do XXXXX, you can't do XXXXX, it’s not good enough).
9. Declare you are not double minded, and no longer a sinner in God's eyes because Christ lives in you as His temple. He purified you so he can live in you. You have been cleansed once and for all by the blood of Jesus Heb 10:2.
10. Declare and speak it - you have been perfected by the blood of Jesus by one offering He has done Heb 10:14.
11. Declare you have been sanctified (holy; set apart; belonging to the Lord) by the blood of Jesus Heb 10:10.
12. Do not speak evil against others but speak life, blessings, grace, and love over them.
Jam 4:7 Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. …. Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you. 11 Do not speak against one another, brethren.
13. Learn to be silent and hear God’s voice.
Since we have the mind of Christ, we need to learn to hear God’s voice and respond to Him who speaks to us from heaven. The process of hearing God’s voice begins with our own silence. We speak less, learn not to respond to the voice of the enemy, and start responding to the voice of the Lord.
Words and how to use them were never my strength. I was very quiet as a little girl, afraid to speak, afraid of people, and very shy. I was a good target for those who know how to draw their swords (words). And here I am now, walking with the Lord and learning that the less I speak, the better. That God is not really interested in my many words to Him but in having a conversation with Him.
Ecclesiastes 5:1-2 NASB 1 Guard your steps as you go to the house of God and draw near to listen rather than to offer the sacrifice of fools; for they do not know they are doing evil. 2 Do not be hasty in word or impulsive in thought to bring up a matter in the presence of God. For God is in heaven and you are on the earth; therefore let your words be few.
The idea is, it is better to remain silent than to speak. It is the Lord’s voice anyhow that matters.
He spoke and the world was created.
His voice is powerful. His majestic voice shatters, lifts up, breaks, goes through fire, shakes the dry places, causes birth (new fruits), and uncovers the forests (Psalm 29:3-9)
It is interesting that our healing comes when we let God’s voice be heard (and not ours of our old dead nature). When we believe that Jesus our Savior has done what is right - he fulfilled every demand of the Law and made us right with God apart from our performance Rom 3:28. healing will come when be believe right - that we are not wrong with Him when our works (performance) fails. Our right standing with God does not depend on us or our works, but only because of Jesus and His finished works. He will help us in the midst of any struggle. When we keep (guard) His Word of truth in our heart our righteousness in Christ will heal our body, mind, relationships, marriage, finances, business and any area that needs healing.
This is under the Law, you receive from God only if you keep the Law; it is a conditional love based on YOU and YOUR performance. But under the new covenant, Jesus fulfilled the law for us and He is the one who did right and fulfilled the Law of works and all its commandments:
Exodus 15:26 NASB And He said, "If you will give earnest heed to the voice of the LORD your God, and do what is right in His sight, and give ear to His commandments, and keep all His statutes,(as a result) I will put none of the diseases on you which I have put on the Egyptians; for I, the LORD, am your healer."
We know what happened when Abraham listened to the voice of his wife to bring the Egyptian slave as his wife…. A slave woman entered his house and a false fruit was born out of this mess (Gen 16:2).
Hagar represents the old covenant of the Law.
The only voice the Lord listens to is His voice in us. His word of truth and freedom in our hearts. When the Israelites cried out to the Lord in their distress He heard their voice. He heard their cry (Num 20:16).
It is not our voice, who we say we are, who we think we are - our voice will condemn us and agree with the Law of condemnation that we are not good enough. But we're not under such law that points to sin and failure of our performance;
We need to learn to listen to the voice of the Lord through the new covenant of grace. God remembers our sins no more because He cast them as far as the east is from the west. Do you think he is going to fly all over the universe to bring back the account of all our wrong and sins?
No! God is Love. Love is kind and gentle. Love keeps no account of your wrong. Why? because the certificate of debt with charges against you was canceled, and nailed to the cross. You are clean and pure in God’s eyes.
We need to have a relationship with God or with people when we know it’s not about who I think I am but who God said I am in Christ. People see our dead flesh; our dead old nature which manifests; and they measure us by our works. God measures us by one Standard only. Not by your performance; but by Jesus works and His identity. Christ is your Standard by which God measures you. As He is, so you are in this world.
I remember when the Lord delivered my husband and I from a season of poverty and great affliction. I prayed and fought against the devil and used any prayer I knew to crush and pulverize, cancel his plan and destroy his power. At a certain point, a month before the Lord delivered us He shut my mouth and I could hardly pray. I had no idea what happened to me and I cried out to the Lord to help me pray. After the Lord pulled us up from that pit He spoke to me and said “I didn’t want you to think that because of your many prayers I delivered you”
Wow, He allowed my mouth to be shut because it’s not about me, what I know or can do, who I am or what I possess. It is all about who He is and His finished works. It's not about me saving myself by doing this or that; but because of who he is. He is love and He loved me enough to die for me, sacrifice His life for me, give me the victory so I can rest from my works.
The Lord has been teaching me when not to say a word, and be silent and listen to Him, and when even a sigh, or one word is considered prayer. I can sigh and say “father…”, or “Lord…….”, or “help …” and He already knows what I prayed for. It's never because of my many words, long prayers and being good enough. I will never be good enough; only Jesus is and I am in the Beloved. So, i am already pleasing to the Father apart from my works. But I didn’t know that truth.
What an amazing God we have. My fear of man and my inability to express myself became a strength in my life. When I don’t know what to say or how to say something I can trust who He is for me; what He has done, and Him to speak His voice. I can trust Him to give me the words, to guide me, and give me rest.
I don’t need to argue my case, to defend myself because I am right with God apart from my works. He has already justified me by His blood; so there is no need to justify myself. I have a Savior who is my Shield and my Refuge and He won the battle for me. When I am weak and don't know what to say, I wait for Him, He shows up and fights for me. He spoke to me once and said to me “Elana, there is no need to justify yourself, I have already justified you.”
It is the Lord that argues your case:
Psa 119:153-154 NLT Look upon my suffering and rescue me, for I have not forgotten Your instructions. (154) Argue my case; take my side! Protect my life as You promised.
When we find our position in Christ as righteous by faith, and not by works (by our good or bad performance) we will find ourselves arguing less and fighting less over who we are or what is ours. we will find rest and peace, trusting who Jesus is and not who people say we're not. We will also find the Lord's blessings and the fulfillment of His promises.
Three times Isaac dug a well. The first two times there was an argument over the well. The third time God gave him favor and there was no dispute over it. Then Isaac moved to a place called "seven wells" (Beersheba) where the Lord appeared to him to bless him.
Gen 26:20 But then the shepherds from Gerar came and claimed the spring. "This is our water," they said, and they argued over it with Isaac's herdsmen. So Isaac named the well Esek (which means "argument"). 21 Isaac's men then dug another well, but again there was a dispute over it. So Isaac named it Sitnah (which means "hostility"). 22 Abandoning that one, Isaac moved on and dug another well. This time there was no dispute over it, so Isaac named the place Rehoboth (which means "open space"), for he said, "At last the LORD has created enough space for us to prosper in this land." 23 From there Isaac moved to Beersheba, 24 where the LORD appeared to him on the night of his arrival. "I am the God of your father, Abraham," He said. "Do not be afraid, for I am with you and will bless you. I will multiply your descendants, and they will become a great nation. I will do this because of My promise to Abraham, My servant."
I am learning to live in that freedom and let the Lord show Himself strong and mighty in my weaknesses. I am learning to rest in Him, stay under His wings and respond to Him, not to the voice of the accuser.
Blessings
Elana
No comments:
Post a Comment